


All my Love

by Pantton_Sandacers



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series), Thomas Sanders, Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Comfort, Fluff, Food mention, M/M, Periods, Sensory Overload, autistic patton, logicality - Freeform, trans patton
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-01
Updated: 2018-06-01
Packaged: 2019-05-17 00:08:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,353
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14821511
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pantton_Sandacers/pseuds/Pantton_Sandacers
Summary: (FTM, Autistic) Patton is on his period and feeling dysphoric while also experiencing sensory overload. Fortunately, his boyfriend Logan knows how to comfort him.





	All my Love

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this as a vent fic and thought I’d post it cause I kinda like how it turned out. Also, the song Logan sings to Patton in the fic is “Last Night on Earth,” by Green Day.

It was that time of the month for Patton and that meant 2 things were certain, he was even _more_ emotional than usual and dysphoria was a pain in the you-know-where.

Times like these also made Patton hyper-sensitive to everything, not just emotion-wise.

Every sound, no matter how soft, sounded like a scream.   
Every sight stung like a strobe light to his eyes.   
Every unwelcome touch to his skin felt like a searing burn.  
Every sensation overwhelmed him so much he could only fold in on himself further.

He was currently huddled on his bed, hugging his legs close to his chest as he cried into his knees for the... what? 14th time that day?

This time it was because he’d been trying to work, but his brain wasn’t allowing him to process text, which frustrated him to no end. He knew he _needed_ to get work done, he’d delayed it long enough and if he didn’t do it soon it would pile up and he’d get behind. And now he was _trying_ to be productive, but he _couldn’t_ because his bran _wouldn’t let him process things._ It wouldn’t be long before all the stress would become too much, overwhelm him, and make him shut down.

Patton sobbed into his knees, being reminded of his workload and feeling suffocated under it. He gripped the fabric of his trousers tighter, his knuckles going white, needing _something_ to ground himself.

Unfortunately he could only pull his legs so close to him, (all his binders were in the wash, so he had to wear a bra today.) and the reminder of how he _really_ was, and the impossibility of his wish to be something he could never be, only served to sadden him more, burying his face into his knees as his body trembled with the force of his sobs.

~*~

Logan softly knocked on the door to Patton’s bedroom, pushing it open slowly, “Patton?”

Patton’s crying subsided slightly, he scooted over on his mattress, leaving room for Logan as a silent invitation to join him.

Logan closed the door behind him as he set his bags on the ground for later, moving to sit next to Patton, gently rubbing his back.

Patton wrapped his arms around Logan’s torso, resting his head against Logan’s chest as he cried into his shirt.

Logan held Patton close, carding a hand through his hair and softly scratching the scalp.

And then. Logan did something he rarely did. He softly began to sing.

Though he’d sung in a few videos they’d done, most of the time he reserved his singing voice for Patton’s ears only. It helped calm him in moments like this, and Patton thought it sounded beautiful, swooning over the sweet sound of Logan’s singing.

As Logan cradled Patton against his chest, he softly began one of Patton’s favorite songs,

_“I text a postcard sent to you,_   
_Did it go through?_   
_Sending all my love to you.”_

Patton smiled weakly to himself as more tears left him, relaxing slightly against Logan. He was so grateful to have Logan as his boyfriend, and so thankful Logan didn’t mind helping him in moments like these.

_“You are the moonlight of my life,_   
_Every night._   
_Giving all my love to you.”_

Logan began to slowly sway the two of them to the music.

_“My beating heart belongs to you,_   
_I’d walk for miles ‘til I found you._   
_I’m here to honor you,_   
_If I lose everything in the fire,_   
_Sending all my love to you.”_

By the time Logan finished singing, Patton’s crying had subsided to the occasional sniffle, and was now breathing more steadily, not planning on moving from his spot in Logan’s arms anytime soon.

Logan smiled at Patton, gently placing a kiss on his forehead as he whispered, “I love you, Patton.” Logan knew in these moments Patton usually went nonverbal, so he interpreted Patton’s action of smiling and hugging him closer as an, “I love you too.”

~*~

After a moment of comfortable silence, Logan spoke again, “I have a few things I think you’ll like.”

Patton looked up at Logan, sniffling slightly, tear tracks shining on his red cheeks in a silent question.

Logan brought up a laundry bag, fishing around in it before pulling out Patton’s cat hoodie and a pair of fluffy, dog-printed pajama bottoms, “Fresh out of the dryer,” he smiled.

Patton couldn’t help but smile too, cuddling closer into Logan as a thank you.

Logan held Patton closer for a moment before patting his back slightly, “C’mon, let’s get you changed.”

Patton nodded shifting slightly away from Logan so he could help him change.

Logan gently pulled Patton’s shirt off, and when Patton looked down and saw the bra he wore, he began to cry again.

Logan noticed this and hugged Patton, whispering reassurances into his ear, “Don’t worry about any of that, love. You’re the handsomest man I’ve ever met, darling. I love you so much, you are the best boyfriend anyone could hope to ask for,” and so on.

Patton sniffled into Logan’s shoulder, arms wrapped around his waist. Logan’s loving words brought Patton to cry tears of happiness and gratefulness for his beloved boyfriend, smiling weakly as he buried his face in Logan’s neck.

Logan continued his praise, rubbing his boyfriend’s back soothingly until his crying had calmed to sniffling. Then Logan drew back enough to kiss Patton gently and sweetly on his nose.

Patton couldn’t help but giggle silently at the cute, gentle gesture, signing, “thank you.”

“Of course,” Logan replied, carding a hand through Patton’s hair before moving to change Patton into his pjs.

~*~

When Patton was comfortable in  his pjs under the covers of his bed, Logan changed into his own (Star Wars themed) pjs and sat next to Patton.

“I have more things for you, love,” Logan pulled out 2 items from a different bag and Patton couldn’t help but gasp when he saw a pair of new stuffed bears made to look like the two of them.

“I got the idea and I couldn’t resist,” Logan smiled sheepishly, handing the Logan bear to Patton.

Patton grinned and hugged the bear tight against his chest. Patton looked at Logan and signed “thank you, I love you,” and Logan smiled, “I love you too,”

“I still have more, darling,” Logan pulled a heart-shaped box of Dove chocolate and a copy of Monsters Inc. out of the bag.

Patton’s smile grew, and he nuzzled Logan’s chest with his head in thanks.

“I’ll put the movie in and then we can watch it and cuddle, does that sound good, love?”

Patton nodded, hugging his Logan bear close to his chest.

Logan placed a kiss on Patton’s forehead before starting the movie and snuggling in next to him under the covers.

Patton leaned against Logan’s chest as Logan wrapped an arm around Patton. Patton felt he was calm enough to speak again, and softly whispered, “Lo?”

Logan turned to look at Patton, “Yes, love?”

Patton’s voice was croaky as he whispered, “Thank you, for everything. You’re the best boyfriend I could ever hope to have, I love you.”

Logan ran a hand through Patton’s hair, “You deserve only the best, darling, nothing less.”

Patton grinned, nuzzling closer to Logan, thinking over all that his boyfriend had done for him, he’d certainly done his best, which Patton loved about him. The credits were silently playing on the tv, and Patton took the opportunity to quietly sing a familiar tune,

_“With every breath that I am worth,_   
_Here on earth,_   
_Sending all my love to you.”_

Logan half-smiled fondly before joining in,

_“So if you dare to second guess,_   
_You can rest_   
_Assured that all my love’s with you.”_

They both began to sway with the music as they sang in harmony.

_“My beating heart belongs to you,_   
_I walked for miles ‘til I found you,_   
_I’m here to honor you,_   
_If I lose everything in the fire,_   
_Did I ever make it through?”_

When the movie began, they watched it, cuddled together and snacking on chocolate before they both eventually fell asleep.


End file.
